Beautiful Soul

I met someone today, she seemed to be a counsellor. A schoolmate's having probs with her modules and was asking the whereabouts for her education. I was asked what course I am in...if I like it after a reply of "Mechatronics."

"Its okay... just that I have to really force myself to study instead of enjoying it as a whole package."

"Ok... so that's something got to do with robots?.. That's good. At least you're perservering. What course did you wanted to take up then?"

"I wanted design...." ....

le8juillet08. 2303.

"Yea, you're more of a creative person. I'm quite surprised you're taking Mechatronics."

She saw my notebook. My scribbles and plain hand writting of "Chemistry", "Chem", "Chemise" on my 4th year scrap book. Decided to use the 3/4 pages that are clean. Turned out, she has those kinda notebooks too and she's giving them away. She asked for my number and asked how many books I want. I can take for my friends too, "for free." What more, she liked my freaking handwrittin. Even asked if I were the one who designed it. GOSH. I found the writting plain actually. She wanted me to design one of her books. GOSH.

Bottom line is:

Many people have told me I am not the engineering sort of person. I am creative. Arts, Language are what speaks volumes when you see me... my major elements. But no... sadly, I am not majoring what you see in me. =(

I told her to see the prospects of both: Design and Engineering. To make us both happy, I told her I might consider taking design as a sideline.

UGH.

It gets real hard for me to sometimes push myself to something I really hate doing, like math and farking physics in mah brain... i detest them. People aren't helping either when they convince me I am not sorta person. This has been happening countless times. It sickens me.

I just end up with a sigh...Tryna look at the bright side too... but it is I who do that... not from external sources... they are never of a help. kicksomeass.

HOW DO YOU DEFEND YOURSELF? DAMNIT. I ALREADY KNOW WHAT "FAULT" I AM DOING. BUT THIS IS WHAT I CHOSE. I HAD TO CHOOSE AND THIS IS THE PATH I WAS LED TO/LEADING. SO LET ME BE AND STOP TELING ME WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING CZ CIRCUMSTANCES DOESNT LET ME BE. I ALREADY HAVE TO CONVINCE MYSELF EVERYDAY. keep ur comments to urself ok? its too painful for me to go back and realise that time and time again. you're not helpin! (lol)

just how are you gonna react when you're in mah shoes?

wilkommen

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The name's Karen.
Currently residing in Singapore
But her heart belongs in Baguio City
She yearns to go to America
where her relatives and frens live.
Born on the 15th June
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